What do I do now?

Trust, Strength, and Love

What does your child hear when you step back to allow them to struggle?

I have yet to find an experience that squeezes my heart, like watching my child struggle. From climbing and buckling themselves into their car seat (20 minutes later, sweaty and frustrated but triumphant) to juggling their young adult life working, playing, learning, loving, and paying bills. 

In the gentle art of parenting, a dance unfolds between guidance and independence, a rhythm that shapes the growth of young souls. Often we want to step back and let our children wrestle with their struggles and decisions, cultivating their inner strength.

Imagine this: a moment of distress flickers across your child's eyes, and instead of offering a swift solution, you pose a question, "What do you need from me – just to listen, to give you space, or to offer ideas?" This simple query carries profound significance.

The Threefold Message: Trust, Strength, and Love

"I trust you." These three words convey a mighty affirmation. By extending your trust, you grant wings to their aspirations, affirming their capability to navigate the labyrinth of life's challenges.

"Your decision-making muscles are getting stronger." The path ahead is paved with choices, some easy and others daunting. By allowing them to make decisions now, you're nurturing their ability to handle high-stakes situations in the future. With practice comes mastery, and with mastery comes courage.

"I love you." Love takes on diverse forms; sometimes, it manifests in stepping back. Overwhelming them with instructions is born of fear, but offering presence, attentiveness, and respect is a warm embrace. This love requires discipline - a discipline that breeds trust and intimacy.

As we embark on this parenting voyage, let us remember the power of these words. The art of offering space, guidance, and trust is akin to tending to a delicate garden, nurturing the blossoming of resilience and wisdom.

Credit: Inspired by Laura Sandefer’s Blog Three Buckets of Encouragement

Hi, I'm Jana Pappas. 👋

I'm Head of Learning Center at Acton Academy Concord

We'd love to hear from you. Schedule a call below:

Start here 👋